How well do you know your child?
1. At school, what class does your teen enjoy the most and why?
2. Who is your son’s or daughter’s best friend?
3. What is your son’s or daughter’s favorite way to relax?
4. Who or what is your teen’s favorite:
-Singer or type of music?
-Flavor of ice cream?
-Food?
5. What is the nickname your teens’ friends call him or her?
6. What is the last problem your teen came to you with?
7. What does your teen do that you are most proud of?
8. What is your teen doing toward a career or educational goal?
Starting Conversations
How do you begin a conversation with your child about sensitive, personal topics? Some of the suggestions below may be helpful:
Share a brief story about something that happened to you at their age. Be honest and open and let your child know you got in trouble, were embarrassed, had strong feelings, etc.
Comment on a current "top hit" on the radio and ask what your child thinks of the lyrics. Remember never "put down" popular music even if you don’t like it!
Say something like "I heard a woman talking to her teen about herpes the other day and I wondered if you had any questions."
Comment on a recent event on the news or in the neighborhood (e.g. pregnancy, sexual abuse, drug arrest, marriage, or divorce, AIDS) and ask for your child’s opinion about it or whether he or she understands what happened.
Turn to your child while watching TV together and ask how he or she feels about what is going on.
Share the fact that you had a lot of questions when you were young, about dating, relationships, puberty and sex, and you wonder what kind of questions kids have today.
Recognize that your child is growing up and tell him or her you know young people experience new feelings and behaviors at this age. Add that it can sometimes be confusing and that you want to talk about some of the changes that you’ve noticed.
Begin conversations with "What would you do if…?" and "What have you heard about…?"
Parent Information
There are several key points to keep in mind when starting a conversation with your child.
Wait for an appropriate time ? quiet, private, neither of you is distracted. The car is great ? you don’t have to make eye contact. H.A.L.T.S. - Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, or Sick.
Remember your child might be embarrassed ? be sensitive to that and tell him or her that is normal and ok. Admit to being embarrassed yourself if you are!
Try not to be judgmental. Be open-minded.
Have a caring attitude. Express your hopes and expectations for your child and your trust in his or her behavior and maturity.
Hurtful language stops communication. Be aware of non-verbal communication